Letting Grief out to Play

Every year, I would sit down during the three weeks and write. I always wrote about pain and suffering, the land of Israel and the idea of redemption. I couldn't run away from relating to the entire period so intensely and savagely. Fearfully. There was always an element of fear that flowed through my emotions. … Continue reading Letting Grief out to Play

How to Lose Your Faith and Keep Your Friends

how to lose your faith and keep your friends

I am one of the few lucky ones. I have my husband and my children on this journey with me. I have my family who loves and accepts me. I have learned to connect with the people I love in ways that don't hurt. We talk about life and feelings and our shared past and … Continue reading How to Lose Your Faith and Keep Your Friends

Sometimes, I Cry Alone in the Night

My previous post touched on the journey my family has been on together. Although we are currently on the same page, my husband and I took different paths and followed forks in the road that sometimes seemed like they would never meet. After the birth of our son, I felt so disconnected from Judaism and lost in … Continue reading Sometimes, I Cry Alone in the Night

A Stroll Through a Lifetime

I need to preface this blog post with a bit of an explanation as well as an apology. I have been toying with an idea for a while now. I did not know how to begin until today when I was struck by the love and understanding I have for the ultra-Orthodox world my husband … Continue reading A Stroll Through a Lifetime

13 Years

We stand under the canopy separated by the discomfort we feel at the display. You are wearing the uniform of a team you don't really play for. Your hair is cut according to someone else's taste. Even your shoes are a stranger's style. I am in white for the first time in my life. My … Continue reading 13 Years